Category Archives: Mummy

We’re saving the children, aren’t we Mummy?

STCcrop-20160425085724456The advert for Save The Children has just been on.

The one where they say they are helping every last child.

It’s Saturday night after a tough day flying solo with tears, emotions and play dates.

I’m on my third glass of wine.

And the 399th time one of them has said Mummy today.

When the 400th ‘Mummy’ was ‘Mummy, we are saving the children aren’t we?’

Everything just crumbles.

Kids just have that ability.

To just break down any walls you have built up.

Any stress level that is combusting.

They can smash it down with seven words.

The power of seven words.

I’ve instilled kindness from a young age.

We sponsor Faraja from The Small Things orphanage.

We send money to children who have no water.

I’ve shared my new business idea with the children.

An idea which helps people here and overseas.

Mothers.

Mothers who can then help their children.

Kindness is everything and I’m going all in with that.

They are all in.

Starting a new business can induce wobbles.

Lots of them.

Then you hear your six year old tell you that we are going to save the children.

Then you know you are on the right track.

Especially when you are on that edge after a bad day.

That kind of bad day when the wine bottle looks good at 12.30pm.

I want the power of a six year old.

I’m going to harness that and go all in.

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You Are Really Something, You Just Don’t Know It…Yet

Untitled design (5)1235457_10152332522187927_5074654042514134462_nFor your first 15 months you had me all to yourself.

We didn’t sleep a lot.

The night times were dark times.

And not just because there was no sun.

But the days made up for that.

We played and played and played.

You loved animals. You still do.

We did everything together and never left each other’s sides.

Your cheery disposition has not faltered in 8 years.

Your beautiful, kind and upbeat nature makes you easy to mother.

And this I have taken for granted.

You never ask for my time.

You never ask me to play.

You busy yourself with your sports, nerf guns and Lego.

And the iPad.

Which I moan to you about.

But I have taken you for granted, my ‘easy’ child.

Because I have a demanding child who I give my attention to.

Today I realised how much you need me and I don’t give you my time.

I am busy all the time.

And not busy with you.

Your lack of confidence struck in many ways tonight.

You don’t have anything tangible that you are brilliant at.

Something that you can understand.

And tonight you showed that.

Just a simple thing watching Britain’s Got Talent.

You can’t do a front flip like your little sister.

And you started worrying about what your talents are.

Your brain is not big enough to understand your talents yet.

You are introverted and unsure.

We are so alike in so many ways.

We love the same things.

Travelling. Reading. Learning.

But know this.

2015-10-31 09.41.53-1My 8 year old best boy.

You are brilliant.

You are kind.

And you care.

This matters above everything.

I promise to build you up.

I don’t want you to waste away inside yourself with insecurities.

I won’t let that happen.

As it happened to me.

You will be someone.

Someone who cares.

Someone who makes a difference.

I can feel it in our bones.

We have the same bones.

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The Black Hole of Motherhood

When I became a mum, I was full of questions for my mum.

What age did I sit up, roll over, sleep through for the first time?

I remember being stunned when my mum said she couldn’t remember.

How could you forget all these things?

I’m now into my 8th year of being a mum and I can barely remember their birth weights.

Thank heavens for baby records.

If you remember to write in them.

This memory loss has in the past made me feel bad but I think it is natures way.

Let me digress.

I had my children really close together – they are 16 months apart.

They both didn’t get the sleeping through memo and I was awake for what felt like 3 years solidly.

It was so so hard.

I was a stay at home mum with a business too.

Staying at home with children was never something I planned and was the hardest thing I will ever do.

I kind of remember it feeling like a really dark time and wanting to walk out of the house and never come back on the really bad days.

But the magic of mother nature is painting over that now.

I look at photos and all I see is happiness.

I can barely remember the bad days and how I felt.

So I am glad I can’t remember what time of day it was when they took their first steps or what their favourite food was.

I just know I was there every day to catch them when they fell, wipe their messy faces and cuddle them to sleep.

That’s all the memories I need.

Happy Days

Happy Days

 

 

7 Years

7 years.

With you, my boy.

I try hard not to focus about how your childhood is whizzing past.

But as your birthday comes around, I can’t help but feel emotional.

You are growing up.

Your soul gets more beautiful every day.

As a baby, you taught me that I had to be brave and come out of my shell.

When you were a pre-schooler, you showed me that smiles and laughter were the only things we needed.

Now, you are teaching me to look at the world with your eyes.

You are so full of wonder and innocence.

Your kindness and patience stops me in my tracks sometimes.

You have this extraordinary thirst for knowledge and experience.

You makes me so proud to be your Mummy.

Just recently, you said to me “Mummy, by the time I am a big boy, I want to have adventured the world”

And that is what we are going to do.

I didn’t need much inspiration to work hard but I now have some rocket fuel to keep me going.

We will adventure the world.

I will help to open your eyes to the world.

The way you help open mine to the way life should be lived.

 

Seth 7

 

 

 

Wobbly Tooth…Wobbly Mummy

The tooth fairy is on her way.

We have finally made her list.

My boy has a wobbly tooth.

His face when he came out of school was bursting.

I thought he had done something exciting and couldn’t wait to tell me.

He had a wobbly tooth.

And bam, I was wobbling.

I didn’t expect to feel like that.

He was my baby five minutes ago.

We waited ages for that first tooth to come through.

Why? What was the hurry?

Things were slower back then.

Days filled with baby groups, learning new skills and trying new food.

I remember days when they seemed to drag because they were so testing.

Wondering how I was going to get through the day.

Because my boy had been up all night teething.

I’d love those slow days to come back.

Life is on fast forward now.

Permanently.

Breakfast, school, tea, homework, bed.

And repeat.

Everything feels in a rush.

Weekends are filled with parties, football and gymnastics.

I want a slow day of drinking in my boy.

So Little Miss Tooth Fairy.

When you come, you are not leaving any money.

You are bringing a voucher.

A Do What You Want Day voucher.

For me and my boy.

And now I can’t wait for that tooth to come out.

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The Parenting Memo You Don’t Get About July

You’re a parent.

You will have been told a million times that children grow up fast.

‘Enjoy them, it goes quick’.

‘They’ll soon be leaving school’

When you have a toddler, it seems like a lifetime away.

Then they start school.

And then you will know what those people mean.

School years are faster than normal years.

September begins all fresh with new bags and pencil cases.

Ready to gather up your broken sanity from the madness that was the 6 weeks holidays.

Then the school year will whizz around in a whirr of assemblies, world book days, easter egg hunts and sports days.

Your Sunday nights are spent preparing for the week ahead.

Getting uniforms ready, doing spelling and homework projects.

Your evenings are spent helping them to read their books.

Then before you know it will be July.

Their uniform will be small and riddled with pen marks you can’t get out.

Another year gone.

A knot will arrive in your tummy when you think about your baby growing up.

You may have to go to an assembly about growing up.

You may need tissues.

It goes by in a flash.

Take some time in that school year to press pause and just be with your children and soak them in.

Get off the school hamster wheel in the school holidays if you can and cherish them.

*This memo is written by a mum who’s baby has just left Reception.

**This a  mum who watched tons of parents and Year 6 children crying because they were going to high school.

***She doesn’t want to go there.

 

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It’s Only A Buggy…

…said my husband as he took the last ‘baby’ thing we owned to the charity shop.

It was only a buggy.

But it was confirmation that I would never push a buggy again.

Not that I want to really.

But that is not the point.

It was like a million memories of both the guys in that pushchair just flooded into my brain at once.

Awash with sentimentality now.

I used to be sad when they moved up a clothes size when they were babies.

Going from 9-12m to 12-18m felt like the worse jump.

From baby to toddler.

I have to try hard to fight that now and enjoy every single moment I share with them.

It’s so hard at this time of year though.

July brings the close of a school year and saying goodbye to their teachers.

School years whizz by so quick.

July is when it all comes to a head that they are growing and changing.

Brings a lump to my throat.

My beautiful niece leaves her primary school tomorrow.

I’m sure last time I looked she was only 8.

But as I tell myself all the time.

The only way to slow down the clock is to enjoy every single second you can with them.

So I have just decided.

We are going to write a summer holiday bucket list together.

And do as many of them as we can.

Making memories to keep forever.

You can’t take them to the charity shop.

It was only a buggy.

 

 

Fussy Eating 1 Mummy 0

My children’s eating habits have always been the hardest thing about parenting for me.

I have turned a corner with the boy though, thankfully.

Using the hints from the book ‘French Kids Eat Everything’ worked a treat with him.

I wrote about this on the Baba+Boo blog.

He’ll eat anything in front of him now.

He even tried my lobster on holiday and loved it.

It sent Boo the completely wrong way.

She became so much worse and she became nervous and scared at meal-times.

It was distressing for both of us.

The first thing she asked in the morning was ‘what is for tea’ tonight.

So so stressful.

I was giving her a fear of food.

She struggles with new things in every aspect of life.

It all needs to be on her terms.

She needs order and she needs to be in control.

Very like me.

So I realised I need to start again with her.

And trying new foods needs to be her choice.

Now on Sunday, we sit and plan what she wants for her tea all week.

I have a very clever mummy, who made me a gorgeous family meal planner.IMG_3738

She is so much calmer.

She only has a limited choice of foods to choose from.

I’m really hoping that they will increase.

I’m actually quite certain that she will start trying new foods.

The foods she likes are not the healthiest of choices.

But so what.

She is happier.

We are both less stressed.

I am sure one day, she will like lobster too.

 

Looking Back

I attended a baby event today with other baby advisory companies.

It was called Life After Birth.

It was all about the things you need help with after birth.

It took me right back to my beginnings of being a mum.

I wasn’t expecting to be so emotional today.

I was just there to show parents why I think they should use cloth nappies.

Lisa from Daisy Birthing did a talk about positive birthing.

Claire from Baby Calm did a talk about how your baby is meant to be close to you.

Kat from Sale Sling Library did a talk about slings and how much of a positive impact they have on parenting.

It made me think about the birth of my first child.

I had pre-eclampsia, so I was induced as I we were in danger.

I wasn’t stressed though, so I think it went as well as it could be

But being a new mum was so far from what it would be.

My baby wouldn’t settle.

He didn’t like his pram.

He didn’t like his moses basket.

He didn’t like car seat.

I know now that he wasn’t designed to like them.

He was designed to me as close to me as possible.

He is 6 now and still likes to be attached to me.

When Kat talked about the importance of slings.

I felt sad.

I wished I had used one with the boy.

It would have saved my sanity.

It would have made my boy happier.

So many regrets.

Well maybe not regrets, just wish I knew better moments.

I actually makes me broody.

I want to do it all again, just so I can do it right.

It’s not going to happen though.

The fella said I can get a dog instead.

Feeling The Fear and Doing It Anyway

I read this book by Susan Jeffers in May last year.

I’ve always been shy and nervous of new situations.

Meeting new people especially.

So I bought this book to try and get over this fear.

It had held me back.

I am a firm believer in changing things if you are not happy with them.

I read it and then put it away.

Didn’t really embrace it but one thing stuck with me.

Making your comfort zone bigger.

So on New Years Day 2014, I wrote down resolutions that would make my zone bigger.

I checked in on them yesterday.

I’ve done a lot of them.

Go to a gym class, which I had a huge phobia of.

Check.

Be brave.

Going to do a school talk tomorrow about waste – my suggestion.

Check.

Get a personal trainer.

It actually hurts to sit down after last night’s session.

Check.

I wished I have tried to make my comfort zone bigger a long time ago.

I get butterflies in my tummy for things still but I know how to channel them now.

I got asked to be a guest speaker at a business event last week.

I would have actually run away at the thought a year ago.

Nervous? Yes.

Looking forward to it? Yes.

I barely recognise me.

I’m definitely doing it anyway.